Two in the terrible twos

Here is our nightly bedtime ritual for the past several months:

Bath Time- usually pretty calm except for me getting compeltely soaked with all the splashing.

Diaper Application- usually pretty civil and uneventful.

Brushing Teeth- Rarely do i get both of the twins to brush at the same time. Always one is off running around and will not come when called. Then I have to go pick the rebel up and bring him/her to the sink kicking and screaming and try to divert to get him/her to brush said teeth. Meanwhile the other sibling has the faucet wide open and is splashing water everywhere in the bathroom. But they actually do brush their teeth after they have swallowed all of the toothpaste.

Book reading time- Can be civil at times if they can agree on what book to read and where to read it. We always read a book before bedtime. We have done so for at least a year and a half now.

Tuck in and light out- Usually around 7:45 PM we try to get them in bed. The beginning of this process is announced by saying "it is nite-nite time" which is always proceeded by a deafening shrill scream of "Noooooooooooo" by Atticus while he bolts for the nearest getaway corridor. Neither of them will let me put them to bed. The wife has Atticus of in bed and Adrienne is always in the room so I remove her so her brother can be tucked in. I have to physically remove her (every night) and she kicks, screams, punches, writhes and thrashes to get out of my arms. If i put her in her bed she immediately bolts for the door and runs to her brother's room and slams the door open to invoke more screaming and crying from him.

So I hold her convulsing body in my arms until the wife closes the door on Atticus with him in bed screaming and crying. I pass Adrienne to the wife after she arrives in the room. The wife rounds up the little girl and gets her calmed and tucks her in and turns out the light. This cannot be done successfully by me.

Then I turn to Lolo who is almost five years old now. I take her to her bathroom where we brush her teeth. She does not swallow the toothpaste but actually uses it correctly and brushes her teeth. Then I supervise her going to potty and flushing. I used to retrieve the toilet paper from a top shelf (the location was in order to avoid the entire roll being flushed down the toilet by aforementioned male destroyer) and hold it for her to tear off but now she does it herself.

We then proceed to her bed and I read her a book. I read her at least one book every night. No kicking, no screaming, no crying. After the book is read she is ready for sleep. She always gives me a hug and I tell her I love her as she sucks the polyethylene molecules from her pacifier. In the past before I left the room she has always requested that her mother to sing her a bedtime lullaby- normally "away in a manger" or something of the sort. But last week when the wife came into her room she has told her "you don't have to sing to me tonight mommy. I am tired. You can just tell me goodnight." Ahhh another milestone.

So that is our nightly routine which is enough to test the likes of people who have raised twenty offspring. I honestly don't know how my wife has remained sane with having the kids at home to herself all day long. School starts back on Monday and both of us are really ready for that. The twins school costs over $600 per month for 5 days/week 9:00 am to 1:00 pm but that is a small price to pay for the wife's sanity.