Another Day in the life of a Premenopausal two year old

Like most days I worked until about 6:30 and made it home around 7:00. From 7:00 to about 8:30 this is how I spend my time:

Lolo greets met at top of stairs and then runs away from me screaming "catch me" . I follow and run her up and down the hall for about 10 minutes

Lolo stops to watch the Max and Ruby DVD that mommy bought for her

Lolo refuses to stop watching Max and Ruby DVD for dinnertime.

Lolo kicks, screams and cries when I try to put her in her high chair.

Lolo gets her way and sits on my lap insists on feeding me rice using a fork and the majority of my food ends up on the floor.

Lolo spills ice cream all over her Vail tshirt that I painstakingly picked out in Vail last year.

Lolo says "no wash hair tonight" after being told that it was bath time.

While I am drawing a bath, Lolo runs underneath Mommy's big belly and hides from me.

Lolo cries when I force her to let me wet, wash and rinse her hair.

Lolo stands up in bathtub and urinates.

Lolo insists on holding scorching hot hair dryer and brush while I am trying to dry her hair.

Lolo refuses to brush her teeth and runs out of the bathroom naked, stops in the middle of the carpeted hall and empties the rest of her bladder.

Lolo kicks and screams when I pick her up to clean her again and install a diaper.

Lolo flails feet trying to kick me when I attempt to apply athlete's foot medication and install shitbag.

Lolo refuses to let me read a bedtime story to her by telling me "No, Daddy read by self."

Lolo picks up her mug with apple juice/allergy medicine mixture and takes two sips before pouring the remainder on the carpet at her feet.

Lolo cries for mommy and wants me to take her to mommy so she can "Hug Kiss" good night.

Lolo sees Hello Kitty band aids laying on dresser and begins hyper-decibel onslaught of screams for "boo-boos" as she calls them.

I give her two "boo-boos" and she calms enough for me to put her in crib.

As I tell her good-night and turn out light Lolo requests "Daddy, juice"

I get her a few more sips of juice with her favorite worm-bendy straw and she drinks them down with the speed of a sloth chewing peanut butter.

As I once again try to exit the room she says "Daddy, take away straw"

As I am closing the door she tries her last stall tactic muttering something about daddy helping with her boo-boos and I ignore her and close the door.

Silence.... and she is still asleep at 10:00!!!!

On top of all of this we think she is getting the chicken pox.

But how can I be mad at this mug!!