Lolo has been using the potty to wee wee for about two weeks now. When she announces that she has to potty she insists that I sit on the toilet beside her. She gets quiet and looks up at me and says "Do you hear anything?" as she listens intently for the sweet sound of splashing piss stream. She will ask this about four times and then jump up and scream "I pee peed!!!"
Then she proceeds to rip to cushion off the potty and pull out the collection container and slosh her used apple juice all over the bathroom as she tries to pour it in the toilet. Now the walls and floor are coverd in Lolo piss and daddy gets to wipe it up.
I can't wait until she starts putting stink pickles in the potty.
The thing that really scares me is that Lolo knows the fucking golden arches!!!! Every time I drive by the local shit-food outlet she says "That is where I get happy meals." The wife and I sure as hell don't buy that garbage for her. Looks like I am going to have to get medieval on the grandparents.
My mother is getting me back for the torture I put her through. I picked up Lolo from her house yesterday and right before we got in the car she gave Lolo 3 Oreo cookies. By the time we reached home there was cream filling smeared on the back of the seats and a mixture of oreo cookie saliva paste and snot all over the car seat and Lolo's clothes.
Damn I must have been an evil little bastard.
3 comments:
HA!
Grandparents are not only dreams come true but worst nightmares too! Their cookie jars are always full - and that is NOT good when bringing over hungry kids.
Okay - I don't know why it always puts my comments down TWICE! ARRGGHH
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